Breakthrough!

After a few days being back in San Diego, and some up and down emotional swings, during which I believe I have avoided expressing any anger to her (although I have let her know how hurt I've been), my girlfriend has conceded that perhaps some of the discussion we'd had is accurate. She doesn't necessarily need to split completely from me, but rather we can continue in a relationship, with the change that she'll have her own apartment and we can use this time to sort through our issues and make the relationship stronger.

I was feeling quite a bit better after that discussion last night - it appears she actually will give me a chance, and although we definitely aren't out of the woods, I now feel that it's likely I will have input into events as they evolve, where before I felt like everything was happening outside of my sphere of influence. Today around lunch she even called and asked to put my relationship counter back on my myspace page... (ex: we've been dating for: )

As much as I tried to remain calm, thinking that it's just a symbol, it doesn't mean everything is perfect, my guts were doing the opposite of the past ~3 weeks, and I felt an overpowering sense of joy and happiness. Funny how that shift was so immediate, extreme, and out of my normally tight emotional control - which requires that my emotions make sense to me. now to let some time take effect and restore a bit of a natural balance to my life...